Many women quietly feel overwhelmed, uncertain or unsure where to begin
For many women, the thought of a pessary fitting brings far more than physical anxiety. Some arrive at appointments already exhausted from pressure, prolapse symptoms, bladder worries, bowel difficulties or months of silently trying to cope alone.
It is extremely common to feel embarrassed, frightened, emotionally exposed or overwhelmed before a fitting appointment — especially when your body already feels unfamiliar or difficult to trust.
Common fears women describe
- Fear that the fitting will hurt
- Worry about feeling exposed or ashamed
- Panic about something “falling out”
- Fear the pessary will feel too large or uncomfortable
- Anxiety that nothing will help their symptoms
- Feeling emotionally overwhelmed before the appointment even begins
Will having a pessary fitted hurt?
A first fitting can feel unfamiliar and you may notice some pressure or discomfort during the examination and fitting. But you shouldn't feel that you simply have to put up with pain.
Tell the person fitting your pessary if something hurts or feels too uncomfortable. They can stop, check the fit or try a different size or type.
You can also ask them to explain what they're doing as they go. If you're nervous, embarrassed or need a moment before continuing, you can say so.
The emotional side of fittings
Many women quietly describe fittings as emotionally intense rather than simply medical. Some women cry afterwards. Others feel relief, grief, exhaustion or emotional numbness all at once.
- Feeling vulnerable during examinations
- Struggling to relax physically
- Fear around body changes
- Trying not to panic during appointments
- Wanting reassurance and dignity
What if my pessary doesn't feel right?
Finding the right pessary can sometimes take more than one fitting. A different size, shape or type may need to be tried before something feels comfortable and gives you the support you need. If a pessary feels painful, keeps slipping, affects your bladder or bowel, or simply doesn't feel right, you can tell the person fitting it and ask for it to be checked.
- Different bodies need different support
- Comfort matters
- Some women prefer softer pessaries
- Needing changes does not mean failure
- Trial and adjustment are often part of the process
Things some women find helpful beforehand
- Wearing comfortable clothing
- Allowing extra time before appointments
- Writing questions down beforehand
- Trying slower breathing before fittings
- Reminding yourself that fear is extremely common